I haven't written here in a long time. Partly because, I didn't know what was going to be in this season in my life and I felt that if I wrote about it too early, it might not go through.
We spent most of this year, back and forth with Jesus, about buying a house. It wasn't easy for us. We didn't know if we would even qualify, get approved, have a down payment, where would we be moving that would be best for us, and so on. We are just merely a family on one income. We sacrifice. After 8 months, God gave His answer and we were approved, beyond all my doubt and fears.
I can't even believe it. Here are us two, my husband and I, who come from nothing, had to work so hard to achieve anything, and we are buying a home. Feels scary and surreal. It's a small little home on a piece of Tennessee country and I feel like I could fly I am so excited. Maybe because for most of my life, I haven't really had a place to call home. And this feels like home. Permanent. A place to dream and build.
When I first moved here I would just stare out the kitchen window and pray that I would never know anything different than this view, and I hope we would never move. But we never had to, because God did.
He moved and started a whole new chapter. Its been hard, to say the least. In my previous post, I described I am truly not the one to wait. I will drive myself literally out of my own mind. I just know that if I have to wait, it will fail.
God is working on that part of my heart.
And I can't tell you how many times I've come to this computer to share, and I just can't get the words out. Mostly because this year has been so up in the air. A lot of finding myself, and a lot of finding forgiveness and grace and approval not in home loans- but in Him.
Here is Christmas, and I have slowed way down and asked God to have me seek SIMPLE and FOCUSED. I don't deserve any of this, not one bit, so its a lot to take in when God blesses so BIG. He is so good, I just can't even take it all in.
Just God, this season. If you are waiting on something BIG, just keep waiting. There is peace in the wait.